The Official Got Spunk Photo Rating System
or: How I Learned To Stop Worrying And Steal Emoticons Off Microsoft While
Maintaining My Dignity
or 
- The Thumbs. The basic answer to the question - "Is this photo
worth my precious time?"
- The Angry
Smiley. Awarded to photos which have caused an impressive amount
controversy.
- The Baked Smiley. Awarded to Photos of people under the influence of various
illegal substances.
- The Pansy-Bitch
Smiley. Awarded to Photos with guys showing emotion.
- The Devil
Smiley. Awarded to Photos that are just plain wrong and evil.
- The Flirting
Smiley. Awarded to Photos with sexual tension you could cut with a
knife.
- The Absolute
Congenital Defect Smiley. Awarded to Photos illustrating people being
complete and utter idiots.
- The Too
Cool Smiley. Awarded to Photos with unnecessary use of sunglasses.
- The Camera.
Awarded to Photos with Outstanding Achievement in the Field of Excellence, Kodak
Moments, or just good looking photos.
- The Mug Award.
Awarded to photos of people who look like Mugs.
- The Film Award.
Awarded to photos which will definitely go in my film, if I make it.
- The Martini Award, for photos involving the sensible consumption of
alcohol.
- The Gwen
Award. In memory of my dog, awarded to photos involving cool animals.
- The 3-Candles
Award. For photos involving exemplary use of jailbait.
- The Chick
Standing By Herself and Doesn't Have Any Friends Award, for photos
displaying people and their annoying personalities.
- The Man Train Award, for Excessive Amounts of Homosexuality.
- The Shmoopies
Rating - For pictures of couples only, the level of Shmoopies involved.
-
The "I Shouldn't Have Done That" Rating. The Level of
Embarrassing-ness involved with the subject.
- The Booze Rating. The Level of Alcoholivity in a photo. Maximum
of 5.
or 
- The Luuuurve Rating. The Level of Love in a photo, the former
representing happy love, and the latter being not-so-happy love. Maximum of 5.
or 
- The Beauty Rating. The Level of Attractivity inherent in a photo.