I've never really been lucky in the aforementioned fields. Originally, it was my thought that I would be forever doomed to wander the earth alone - and this was with good reason. However recently, I have been given hope. Having said that however, I have not exactly taken this hope by the horns, and ridden it to Albuquerque. Instead, my ignorance has paid off. That's right. I have lived the dream of every man, I have not worked at all, and then I received this e-mail. Which I subsequently deleted. But I managed to get my hands on another copy of it. Ahh - Sheer Genius.

Guess what... you've got a secret admirer!

Want to find out who it is? Just click to http://www.CrushLink.com

Email address: hingbo@hotmail.com
Invitation code: ******

Make sure you enter in this information exactly as shown above.

See you soon!

Sincerely,
The Crush Master


PS. This is not junk email. You've received it because someone you know came to CrushLink and confessed an interest in you! Maybe it was that hottie from English class or the cute one at the party last weekend or maybe--well, we can't even give you a hint until you come to CrushLink.com.

PPS. If you do not wish to receive any more of these messages from CrushLink, please visit http://www.CrushLink.com/block.php3

Now ordinarily, I would just ignore this, and this time would've been no different, except I actually got so bored, (And Desperate) I signed up for Crushlink, and decided to find out who my Secret Admirer really is. Now, I was sorely disappointed. Not only was it apparent that nobody really had a crush on me, it also came to my attention that I had fallen for this evil marketing ploy.

Okay, I'll admit it, I signed up, and to my shock, horror and *gasp* I realised that you don't go to these people, tell them who you like, and then they send out an e-mail to that person with that really gay heading. No. What they get you to do, is, when you get an e-mail, you have to guess who sent it to you. And the bastards assume that whoever you guess could've sent it, you obviously have a crush on. So I'm thinking there's a poor girl out there, who can't sleep, because she thinks I like her. And I'm keeping her awake, through no fault of my own, but merely because she's fears I am stalking her. Which I am not - unless it's Jacyleen, who I am stalking - but that's a whoole different story.

Anyway, my second depressing realisation was when I figured out that, as I have said, I had fallen for an evil marketing ploy. The internet, essentially is a breeding ground for really, really, desperate guys. And so by signing up for this, I was assuming the role of a really, really desperate guy. Never again will I ever be able to show my face in public ever again. Not that I was fit for public speculation prior to this, but I still felt ashamed. Crushlink is evil. I have no reservations about that. It is evil, and it is wrong, and I hope that none of you will go forth and sign up for it.

Y'Asian - Out